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PhotoPete
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Interests: Who has time for any stinkin hobby when you spend 28 hours a day in Xangaville?
Expertise: Taking naps. watching movies, taking naps, watching basketball, taking naps.


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Member Since: 3/18/2001

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Wednesday, March 29, 2006


Monday, March 20, 2006

 

“So Madison, where was everybody all last week”

 

“We went on vacation. Did you miss me?”

 

“Sure.  Did you miss me?”

“Nope. We were having fun”

 

 


Monday, March 13, 2006

 

 

I am one of those people that does not recognize famous people when you happen upon them in public.  We were having dinner in NYC where the tables were all jammed up together and some woman had to squeeze behind my chair to leave.  Mrs. Pete hissed at me, “Do you know who that is?”  I took a good look.  “It’s Madonna” she whispers.

 

No way.  I didn’t see Donald Trump on the same visit.

 

I live in Raleigh and have never seen Clay Aiken. His loss.

 

We were at a basketball game recently and we go though the usual, “Look! Do you know who that is?”

 

I see a tall man a few rows down from us.  No, I have zero idea who that is.

 

Mrs Pete says “Use your brain!  You’ve seen him dozens of times.”

 

No clue.  Turns out it’s my doctor.  OK sue me – I’m stupid!

 

 


Tuesday, March 07, 2006


“Hello, are you in charge of the Yellow Page Book deliveries.”

 “Yes sir, that’s me”

“Great. You dropped two giant books on my doorstep today and I need for you to have someone come pick them up.”

”Excuse me?”

 “I don’t want them. I didn’t ask for them. Please come get them”

 “Sir we don’t pick up – we just deliver. If you don’t want them you need to take them to one of our recycle centers”

 “I don’t think so. Why should I go out of my way to drive cross town to your recycle center”

“Listen, we just can’t drive around town picking up the books”

”You have time to deliver books all over town unsolicited, but don’t have time to pick them up. Fine. Let’s say I meet you half way? Say at City Hall.”

 “Sir, just throw the damn books away. OK?”



Friday, March 03, 2006

There was a 7 year old boy who had never uttered a word. His hearing appeared alright and he seemed like a happy kid so the parents resigned themselves to having a mute child.

 

Then one day at breakfast the boy cleared his throat and said, “Uh, the toast is burned.”

 

You can only imagine the emotions the parents experienced! The mother finally was able to ask, “Why haven’t you spoken before?”

 

He looked at her calmly and replied, “Well Mom, everything’s been OK until today”

 

+++

 

So maybe that explains why I’ve not been posting. Everything’s been OK.

 

Except that I was in the shower the other day and realized we were out of soap so I used Mrs. Pete’s liquid soap which turned out to be hair conditioner. It made the hair on my forearms luxurious.

 

So I bought Dial Soap for Men. That’s right. Soap for Men. It is dark blue and it has no scent whatsoever. It is so Manly. And blue.

 

This morning Mrs. Pete wanted to know why the white washcloth is blue. 



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